中美父母與孩子的溝通差異

石麗霞

Introduction

It is obvious that communication as the way of expressing and spreading is one of the most important parts of human daily life. And at the same time， with the development of the society， people pay much attention to the education， especially pre-education. No matter which country you come from， what nationality you belong to， people all think that the family is a persons first school， and the parents are the first teachers. So how to communicate with children in pre-education is become more and more important. That is because pre-education as the elementary stage of all kinds of education， is the first step that the children get in touch with the society. So this paper tends to analysis the differences and reasons on pre-education between China and America. Both the pre-education have their own characteristics and itshard to tell which is better than the other. According to the general comparison of two counties communication in pre-education， hoping that Chinese children can become more rational and more sapiential. After comparison， this paper interprets the reasons of these differences.

1.How do American parents communicate with their children at early ages

For many family， communication between parents and children has become fewer and fewer . Parents should pay much attention to this problem. At the same time， with the development and improvement of the ages， it isnt suitable for parents to communicate with their children in an old way. So the parents must be refreshing their communication way to their children with a newly thinking method. And be patient about the problem which is put forward by their kids instead of using the simple worlds to muddle through their childrens work. So we can know that how the American parents communicate with their Children in pre-education in there parts.

2.How do Chinese parents communicate with their children at early ages

“For Chinese children， the most words they heard are ‘Ting hua. And the earliest pre-education they received is that the child who is naughty is bad. So under the control of their parents， they have to become a kid who is obedient and tractable. So for Chinese parents， they would like to treat their children as youth kids who never grow up. They often stand on a top position to communicate with their children. So Chinese kids or even college student show negative tendencies in character： passive， shy and dependent. Although some of their learning achievements are better than that of American children， they have poor interpersonal skills and lack independent living abilities.

3. Different communicating way because of economic form

American has advanced productive forces， developed commodity economy， many employment opportunities and small stress of survival. So American have open concept about the choice of occupation. American parents think that their children's occupation can not bevalued to be high and low ，as long as it is legal and can make a living in the future society. Therefore， American parents' education purpose is changeless. Compared with American， China has backward economy and deep pressure of survival. With the poor mobility of industry， Chinese people are worried about having a stable job and happy life. So their choice is narrow. Chinese parents believe that good grades can help them find a good job and have a stable life.

4. Conclusion

This paper makes a general comparison about the communication differences between Americans parents and Chinese parents in pre-education. It affirms the existence of individual specificity. Compared with china， the United States' communication ways also have significant limitations. Their children may cause many social problems. Such as crime. Obviously， this paper doesnt completely affirm the differences communication ways， and also doesnt deny Chinese family education. It tries to get some thoughts for reform of communication.

Though the analysis， overall， American parents communication ways are to produce more innovative talents than china. With the improvement of social productivity and the enhancement of social competition， the comprehensive quality of one person will be more and more attractive from the public. So we should change our family education aims from "talent" to" adult education" .