廣東 彭明芳
“我”的朋友在考試時(shí)想抄“我”的答案,“我”認(rèn)為這種作弊行為是不對(duì)的,但“我”內(nèi)心又很怕失去這個(gè)最好的朋友,不知該如何抉擇。 最后一刻,“我”做出了正確的選擇……
題材體裁個(gè)人經(jīng)歷記敘文317★★★文章詞數(shù)難度建議用時(shí)5分鐘
“Keep your eyes on your own paper” is one of the rules that our English teacher,Mrs Smith, has taught us. It is a simple rule, but it's not a rule everybody chooses to follow.
One afternoon, I had an experience with a “rule breaker” during an English exam.When I was doing my English test paper attentively, I felt somebody watching me a little too close. Therefore, I turned my head quickly and saw Tom, who sat right next to me.My eyes caught his attention and he said in a low voice,“I hope you have studied for this test! ” Keeping silent, I gave him a smile, not sure whether he was joking or not, and returned to my test. In order to totally focus on my test, I leaned (傾身) a little more close towards my paper.
But after a while, Tom whispered, “I can't see! ” “What am I going to do?” I thought to myself. Cheating went against my beliefs. I curled my arms around my answers. Then Tom said anxiously, “I am your friend, and what are friends for?” Not knowing what to do, I hesitated for a while. I knew it was not right for me to let Tom cheat in the examination, even if it would make Tom mad. But it was not an easy answer because Tom was my best friend. If I refused him, probably I would lose a friend whom I cherished most.Feeling confused and nervous, I answered, “You know it is wrong, and if the teacher knows, she will punish both you and me.”
Just at that moment, Mrs Smith came and warned us to finish our test papers separately. Not daring to look at the teacher, we completed our test papers independently. I decided to guard my paper so that Tom couldn't see my answers as I knew it was the right thing that I must do.
Useful sentence patterns
1. Not knowing what to do, I hesitated for a while.
分析:not knowing what to do為動(dòng)名詞短語(yǔ)充當(dāng)狀語(yǔ), 表示主語(yǔ)的狀態(tài)。 句意為“我猶豫了一下,不知該如何做”。
2. If I refused him, probably I would lose a friend whom I cherished most.
分析:whom I cherished most是修飾a friend的定語(yǔ)從句。 句意為“如果我拒絕他,我很可能失去一個(gè)我最珍惜的朋友”。
閱讀上面的文章,根據(jù)所給情節(jié)進(jìn)行續(xù)寫(xiě),使之構(gòu)成一個(gè)完整的故事。
注意:
1. 所續(xù)寫(xiě)短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右;
2. 續(xù)寫(xiě)部分分為兩段,每段的開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)已為你寫(xiě)好。
Paragraph 1:
When the exam ended, I thought for a moment, searching for the right words to explain to Tom.
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Paragraph 2:
Tom accepted my idea and tried to study English harder.
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寫(xiě)作導(dǎo)引
一、語(yǔ)篇研讀
要素Who原文情境I, Tom, Mrs Smith續(xù)寫(xiě)情境構(gòu)思理由I, Tom, Mrs Smith, our classmates What In an English examination,Tom wanted to copy my test paper, and I didn't know whether I should allow him to do it. Finally, I made my choice, deciding to guard my paper.WhenOne afternoon After I explained my reasons to Tom, he not only knew that cheating is wrong but also understood it is harmful to him.After he accepted my idea, he tried his best to learn English, and made great progress. We were all proud of him, and he was very grateful to me.Several months later My right choice has a positive effect on Tom.A true friend is the one who can make a right choice for you.WhereIn the classroom at school In the classroom at school or maybe outside school Why I knew that I should make the right choice, which was beneficial to us.A right choice has transforming power.Tom understood me and was a grateful person.
二、情節(jié)構(gòu)思
基于原文和續(xù)寫(xiě)段落首句提供的信息,采用圍繞中心提問(wèn)的方法,構(gòu)思要續(xù)寫(xiě)的故事情節(jié),這個(gè)過(guò)程一般分為四步。
第一步,根據(jù)已給出的文本判斷文章的立意。
根據(jù)已給出的部分記敘的內(nèi)容可知,在英語(yǔ)考試的時(shí)候,朋友湯姆想抄“我”的答案。但老師一直教導(dǎo)“我們”,考試的時(shí)候只看自己的試卷,不要作弊?!拔摇泵靼诇返淖鞅仔袨槭遣粚?duì)的,但內(nèi)心又很擔(dān)心失去這個(gè)最好的朋友,不知該如何抉擇。 最后一刻,“我”做出了正確的選擇——看好自己的試卷,不讓他人抄襲。 再結(jié)合文章的標(biāo)題“一次正確的選擇”可推斷出本文的立意是“正確的選擇的重要性”。
第二步,根據(jù)續(xù)寫(xiě)第二段所給出的段首句倒推續(xù)寫(xiě)第一段應(yīng)包括什么內(nèi)容。
分析續(xù)寫(xiě)第二段的段首句“湯姆接受了‘我’的觀點(diǎn),嘗試更加努力地學(xué)習(xí)英語(yǔ)”可知,續(xù)寫(xiě)第一段要寫(xiě)“我”如何跟湯姆解釋“我”拒絕讓他抄襲的原因,以及“我”的觀點(diǎn)是什么,這樣才能確保續(xù)寫(xiě)的兩段是相銜接的。
第三步,圍繞續(xù)寫(xiě)第一段所給出的段首句以及上面的分析進(jìn)行提問(wèn)構(gòu)思:
1. Why did I refuse to let Tom copy my paper?
2. What were the benefits for Tom to study English?
3. How would I help Tom to study English?
第四步,圍繞續(xù)寫(xiě)第二段所給出的段首句進(jìn)行提問(wèn)構(gòu)思:
1. What would Tom do to study English well?
2. What progress did Tom make?
3. How would the classmates and teachers respond to Tom's progress?
4. What was Tom's reflection?
三、潤(rùn)色成篇
在續(xù)寫(xiě)的過(guò)程中要注意情節(jié)連貫, 各部分內(nèi)容相銜接:1. 兩段的續(xù)寫(xiě)與所給短文的銜接;2. 每段的續(xù)寫(xiě)與續(xù)寫(xiě)段段首句之間的銜接;3. 續(xù)寫(xiě)的兩段之間的銜接。 同時(shí)要注意語(yǔ)言風(fēng)格的一致和語(yǔ)法、句型以及所用詞的準(zhǔn)確性。 比如,刻畫(huà)人物形象時(shí)運(yùn)用恰當(dāng)?shù)膭?dòng)詞使其栩栩如生;描寫(xiě)人物心理活動(dòng)時(shí)使用內(nèi)心獨(dú)白或者描寫(xiě)語(yǔ)言、動(dòng)作等細(xì)節(jié)使其細(xì)微深入。