All Cats Are Grey 凡貓皆灰

西蒙·克里斯蒂安森 孫加

An uncertain outcome.

一個(gè)不確定的結(jié)果。

Test failure： Not- （A AND Not-A）.

Expected value： True.

Result： Indeterminate.

I stared at the screen for several minutes， sighed， and cancelled my appointments for the rest of the day. I would have to see Nicodemus. It had been too long since my last visit to the Copenhagen Centre for Experimental Logic. I cursed myself for not being more vigilant in my duties， grabbed my coat， and went out.

A light rain fell from the grey sky， but the drops slid off the surface of the coat， leaving no moisture behind.

My feet still remembered the way. Less than an hour later， I reached the end of the winding path leading to the entrance of the centre， at the top of the hill just outside the city.

The guard at the gatehouse did not recognize me. I had been lax. He was wearing a blue uniform with the logo of the centre， a large stylized ‘P， embroidered in silver on the front.

“Halt，” he said， patting the tranquillizer gun at his side. In the shadows behind the guardhouse， an Omni-dog patrolled the titanium gates. I made a mental note about the security precautions.

“I am here to see Nicodemus.”

“Do you have an appointment？”

“No.”

The guard waited， apparently expecting more information. When none was forthcoming， he picked up his communicator and had a short， whispered conversation with whoever was on the other end.

“You may pass， sir.” He pushed a button， and the gate slowly opened. The Omni-dog retreated into the shadows.

I made my way through the labyrinthine corridors of the C-CEL complex. Logicians in lab coats stopped and stared as I passed. It was good to see that some people still remembered.

When I reached the door to Nicodemus office， I entered without knocking.

Nicodemus sat behind his desk. He had lost weight， but not much. His ginger hair was still unruly. Grey streaks1 had appeared in his beard.

“I have been expecting you，” he said.

“I should hope so. One of my fundamental tests failed earlier today. What the hell is going on？ Your isolation is supposed to be state-of-the-art.”

Nicodemus licked his lips. “I know. We are just having some… minor issues. Nothing to be concerned about. Coffee？”

I retrieved a soy cigarette from my coat pocket， lit it， and inhaled the invigorating smoke. “Look， Nico， level with me here， will you？ Were both on the same side. We both want to keep the public safe from your bullshit.” The smoke drifted from my mouth as I spoke.

He nodded. “First of all， I would like to remind you of the importance of the work we do here. There is certainly no need to shut us down， like you did with the Institute of Esoteric Analysis. Why， just last month， we managed to completely extricate the set of all sets not a member of themselves from itself. This development is expected to have wide applications in the field of experimental philosophy， and …”

I yawned.

“Sorry，” said Nicodemus. “Anyway， lately we have been doing experiments into paradox， using Schr?dingers cat as a basis， in collaboration with the Department of Arcane Physics. We procured a cat from a local shelter， placed it in an isolated titanium box in a properly isolated test chamber， and went to work.

“At first， the experiment seemed to be a complete success. We managed to keep the cat in a superposition of dead and alive indefinitely， providing a fantastic test ensemble.

“We all went out to celebrate， giddy with the possibilities， trusting in the automated security protocols. When we came back， the lab was in disarray. The isolated titanium box had shattered， leaving mangled pieces all over the room. Even the walls were dented. There was no sign of the cat.

“We thought the wave function must have collapsed， overloading the containment protocols but not leaving anything behind.”

He placed his face in his hands and shuddered. “Then Sonya turned up dead. There were scratches all over her body. But also， simultaneously， there were no scratches. She remained dead， but the cause was indeterminate. It took hours for the state of the body to stabilize！”

He sobbed into his hands.

I took another drag2 of my cigarette. “So， thats why my test failed. Your outer containment protocols are insufficient to handle such a pure paradox. The indeterminacy is leaking into the surrounding area.”

“Yes. We believe that the cat is still loose in the centre， unobserved， possibly driven mad by its paradoxical state. We have been trying to observe it， to collapse the state， but with no luck so far.”

“I understand，” I said. “This is more serious than I thought.”

The fluorescent lights above flickered and went out， leaving the office in pitch darkness. I blinked. Nicodemus swore. The lights came back.

I frowned. “I thought this place was supposed to have multiple redundant back-up generators？”

“It has，” said Nicodemus. “Its a side effect. The lights are working， but they are also not working， if you understand.”

I understood all too well.

“Now， where is that flashlight，” said Nicodemus， opening and closing several desk drawers.

I heard something by the door， scratching， and turned around. Another sound followed， simultaneously a high-pitched shrill meowing and no sound at all.

I steadied myself against the desk and fought back the nausea.

“Doesnt hearing count as an observation？” I asked.

“By God， I wish it did，” said Nicodemus.

The lights flickered again and went out.

The door creaked open.

I prayed for the lights to come back on， to collapse the options， but the room remained dark; indeterminate.

測試失?。悍恰ˋ且非A）

期待值：真

結(jié)果：不確定

我瞪著屏幕，幾分鐘后嘆了口氣，取消了當(dāng)天所有的預(yù)約。非得去見尼科迪默斯不可了。我已經(jīng)太久沒去哥本哈根實(shí)驗(yàn)邏輯中心（C-CEL）。我罵了幾句，責(zé)備自己對工作不夠上心，抓起外套，出了門。

天色灰蒙蒙的，飄著小雨。雨滴從外套表面滑下，沒留一點(diǎn)濕痕。

我的腳還記得去中心的路。不到一小時(shí)，我就到了城外不遠(yuǎn)處的小山，沿著蜿蜒的山路走到盡頭，來到山頂?shù)闹行拇箝T前。

門衛(wèi)室的保安不認(rèn)識我。我太懈怠，來得太少了。保安身穿藍(lán)色制服，胸前用銀線繡著中心的標(biāo)志：一個(gè)大大的花體字母“P”。

“站住?！彼_口道，拍拍身側(cè)的麻醉槍。門衛(wèi)室后頭的陰影中，一只威風(fēng)大狗在兩扇鈦質(zhì)大門后巡邏。我心中暗暗記下這些安保措施。

“我來見尼科迪默斯?！?/p>

“有預(yù)約嗎？”

“沒有?！?/p>

保安沒動，顯然在等我進(jìn)一步說明。見我不開口，他便拿起對講機(jī)，跟那一頭的不知什么人輕聲低語幾句。

“您可以進(jìn)去了，先生?！彼聪掳粹o，大門緩緩開啟。大狗退入陰影中。

我在C-CEL大樓迷宮似的走廊中穿行。見我經(jīng)過，身穿實(shí)驗(yàn)室白大褂的邏輯學(xué)家們停下手頭的工作，盯著我看。還有人記得我，很好。

我來到尼科迪默斯的辦公室門口，直接推門而入。

尼科迪默斯坐在辦公桌后頭。他比從前稍微瘦了些，姜黃色頭發(fā)依舊亂蓬蓬，胡子有了花白的跡象。

“我一直在等您?！彼f。

“你有準(zhǔn)備就好。今天早些時(shí)候，我有個(gè)極為重要的測試失敗了。這到底是怎么回事？你這兒的隔離措施本該是最尖端的喲?！?/p>

尼科迪默斯舔舔嘴唇。“我知道。只是出了點(diǎn)……小問題，沒什么可擔(dān)心的。來杯咖啡？”

我從外套口袋里掏出根大豆煙卷點(diǎn)上，深深吸了口提神的煙霧?！靶辛?，尼科，坦白說了吧，行嗎？我是站在你這邊的，我們都想保護(hù)公眾不受你那套胡扯的傷害?！蔽艺f著，嘴里飄出煙霧來。

他點(diǎn)點(diǎn)頭?！笆紫龋蚁胫厣暌幌挛覀児ぷ鞯闹匾?。您關(guān)閉了秘傳分析研究所，但您絕對不用把我們這兒也關(guān)了。上個(gè)月，我們還徹底解決了‘一個(gè)包含所有集合的集合，自身卻不屬于這些集合這一悖論。這一成果會在實(shí)驗(yàn)哲學(xué)中得到廣泛應(yīng)用，而且……”

我打了個(gè)呵欠。

“抱歉?！蹦峥频夏拐f，“總之，我們最近一直在跟秘傳物理部合作，以‘薛定諤的貓為基礎(chǔ)，進(jìn)行悖論實(shí)驗(yàn)。我們從本地動物救護(hù)站弄了只貓，放進(jìn)隔離的鈦盒子里，再把盒子放進(jìn)隔離良好的測試室，隨即開始工作。

“起先，實(shí)驗(yàn)似乎非常成功。我們讓貓無限保持在既死又生的疊加態(tài)，提供了妙不可言的測試系綜。

“我們想到這一成果將會帶來的種種可能，高興得忘乎所以，加上信任這里的自動化安全協(xié)議，于是全體出門慶賀。等我們回來，實(shí)驗(yàn)室一片狼藉。隔離的鈦盒子碎了，金屬碎片在房間里撒了一地，連墻壁上都有凹痕。盒子里的貓不見蹤影。

“我們猜測是波函數(shù)坍縮了，導(dǎo)致遏制協(xié)議過載，卻什么都沒留下?！?/p>

他把臉埋在雙手中，打著哆嗦?！敖又?，索妮婭忽然死了，身上全是抓痕，同時(shí)卻一條抓痕都沒有。她保持著死亡狀態(tài)，死因卻不確定。過了好幾個(gè)小時(shí)，尸體的狀態(tài)才穩(wěn)定下來！”

他蒙著臉抽泣。

我又深吸了一口煙?！翱磥?，這就是我的測試失敗的原因。你的外層遏制協(xié)議沒法處理如此純粹的悖論。不確定性正在向周圍滲漏。”

“對。我們認(rèn)為，那只貓還在實(shí)驗(yàn)中心到處亂竄，沒被觀察到，可能已經(jīng)被自身的悖論狀態(tài)逼瘋了。我們一直在想法子觀察它，好讓疊加態(tài)坍縮，卻徒勞無功?！?/p>

“明白了?！蔽艺f，“情況比我想的還要嚴(yán)重?！?/p>

頭頂?shù)娜展鉄糸W了閃，滅了。辦公室頓時(shí)一片漆黑。我眨了眨眼睛，尼科迪默斯罵了一句。燈又亮了。

我皺了皺眉頭。“這地方不是有好幾個(gè)備用發(fā)電機(jī)嗎？”

“確實(shí)有?！蹦峥频夏拐f，“這是事故的副作用。這些燈亮著，同時(shí)也沒亮——不知這么說你明不明白?！?/p>

我再明白不過了。

“哎，手電筒在哪兒？”尼科迪默斯一邊說，一邊拉開好幾個(gè)抽屜又關(guān)上。

我聽到辦公室門口響起抓撓聲，于是轉(zhuǎn)過身。緊接著又有某個(gè)聲響，既是尖銳的高音喵喵叫，同時(shí)卻什么聲響都沒有。

我背靠辦公桌，穩(wěn)住身體，盡力克制腹中的惡心感。

“聽到聲音難道不算觀察？”我問。

“上帝作證，我真希望算?！蹦峥频夏够卮?。

日光燈又閃了閃，滅了。

門吱呀一聲開了。

我祈禱燈能再亮，讓多種可能性坍縮。但房間卻仍然漆黑一片;仍然不確定。? ? ? ? ? ?□

（譯者為“《英語世界》杯”翻譯大賽獲獎?wù)撸?/p>