My Good Friend

My Good Friend

Li Ying is my classmate and she is also my good friend.She is fifteen years old this year,but she looks a little younger for her age.Though she isn’t very tall,and her eyes,nose and mouth are very small,but①I think she looks very beautiful.

Li Ying studies very hard.She often asks and answers questions in class.She likes every subject,so she does well at②all her lessons,especially English and math.She often helps others on③their lessons.I think that’s why everyone likes her.

She is a very outgoing girl.She is always smiling and often makes us laughing④,so we all like to play with her.She is confident.She believes she can do everything well.

Now Li Ying has gone to another school.All of us feel very sad,but we wish her the best.We all believe that her dream will come true.

安徽省濉溪縣百善中心學(xué)校七（3）班 趙琪

本期點(diǎn)評(píng)名師

姜經(jīng)志 男，中學(xué)英語(yǔ)高級(jí)教師、省級(jí)骨干教師、淮北市優(yōu)秀教師、中國(guó)外語(yǔ)學(xué)習(xí)學(xué)研究會(huì)會(huì)員、《學(xué)英語(yǔ)》《英語(yǔ)周報(bào)》特約編輯；多年來(lái)，在省級(jí)以上報(bào)刊發(fā)表文章800余篇，并有多篇論文獲獎(jiǎng)；曾主編《初中生英語(yǔ)滿分作文大全》《英語(yǔ)奧林匹克》《新目標(biāo)英語(yǔ)八年級(jí)暑假作業(yè)》，參編《高中英語(yǔ)知識(shí)點(diǎn)反饋與閱讀》《初中英語(yǔ)題典大全》《21世紀(jì)英語(yǔ)學(xué)習(xí)指南》《初中英語(yǔ)新作文》等；曾輔導(dǎo)學(xué)生30余人次在國(guó)家和省級(jí)英語(yǔ)競(jìng)賽中獲獎(jiǎng)。

1.優(yōu)點(diǎn):

本文是一篇成功的寫(xiě)人的記敘文。小作者向我們展示了一個(gè)樂(lè)觀、愛(ài)學(xué)習(xí)、愛(ài)幫助人的好女孩的生動(dòng)形象。

2.需要修改的地方：

①刪去but。英語(yǔ)中，表示“雖然……但是……”時(shí)，用了though，就不能再用but。

②does well at應(yīng)改為does well in。表示“在……方面做得好”，應(yīng)用do well in。

③on應(yīng)改為with。help sb.with sth.是習(xí)慣搭配，意為“幫助某人做某事”。

④laughing應(yīng)改為laugh。make作“使；讓”時(shí)，后面應(yīng)接不帶to的動(dòng)詞不定式作賓語(yǔ)補(bǔ)足語(yǔ)。

3.評(píng)分：

按中考英語(yǔ)作文滿分25分的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)，本文修改前可得22分。