淺議醫(yī)學英語——醫(yī)學專家并非英語專家

錢紹昌

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淺議醫(yī)學英語——醫(yī)學專家并非英語專家

錢紹昌

(上海外國語大學國際新聞學院，上海 200083)

鑒于許多醫(yī)生，包括不少醫(yī)學專家，所撰寫的英語醫(yī)學論文在英語表達上常出現(xiàn)很多錯誤，以實例分析了醫(yī)學論文英語寫作中的欠妥之處，簡述了英語醫(yī)學論文寫作ABC，并指出，醫(yī)生們在學術(shù)造詣精深的前提下，還應努力提高自身的英語水平。

英語；醫(yī)學英語；醫(yī)學論文

記得1954年，當我剛從醫(yī)學院畢業(yè)被分配到上海廣慈醫(yī)院(現(xiàn)瑞金醫(yī)院)外科時，除了醫(yī)療工作外，老師們經(jīng)常派給我一項任務，那就是把一些學術(shù)論文譯成英文。由于我的中學和大學都是在洋學校念的，英文程度較佳，這任務就落到我的頭上了。那時《中華醫(yī)學雜志》有英文版，是向全世界發(fā)行的。這里面什么科的文章都有：內(nèi)科、外科、兒科、婦產(chǎn)科、五官科等等。因為各分科沒有條件各自出一本英文雜志，就只好全混在一起了。上英文版的文章一般是質(zhì)量比較高的。你若有文章上英文版，就說明你的水平比較高，評起職稱來自然也有用處。

到了改革開放以后，許多人就直接把文章寄到國外的雜志去，主要是美國雜志，當然得先譯成英文才行。來找我翻譯的人就更多了。那時我已離開醫(yī)院到上海外國語學院執(zhí)教，業(yè)余也做一些翻譯工作，不過主要是文學和影視翻譯，而對于醫(yī)學翻譯我已不感興趣?？捎袝r情面難卻，也不得不譯一些。為什么有那么多人來找我呢？當然是自己翻譯有困難。本文就是打算來議一下這個問題。

曾看過許多國內(nèi)醫(yī)學專家寫的英語醫(yī)學論文，其中英語錯誤之處實在不少。有些專家還是從國外留學歸國的，口語也還可以，但文章寫出來卻很糟糕。因為盡管他們是醫(yī)學專家，卻并非英語專家，英語畢竟不是他們的母語。

一、舉例

曾有一位醫(yī)學專家用英語寫了一篇關(guān)于肝癌治療的文章。文章在學術(shù)上價值很高，但在英語表達上卻存在著許多欠妥之處。一般英語學術(shù)論文中討論(Discussion)最難寫，最易在文字上出錯。該文的討論有9段之多，現(xiàn)僅取其中的一段為例：

“Many concepts and principles currently accepted in the management of HCC(hepatocellular carcinoma) have to be revised in sub-HCC, namely: (1) Combined analysis of serial change of AFP and ALT alone or added with angiogram or B-sonogram instead of enzymology and scintiscan have become more important for early diagnosis; (2) The role of surgery has become greater in which 48% of sub-HCC could be successfully resected, while it was only 17.7% in clin-HCC; (3) Based on the fact that 83.6% of sub-HCC associated with cirrhosis and 74.3% with tumor seating in right lobe or hepatic porta, local resection rather than classical lobectomy in surgical management of sub-HCC has yielded higher resectability, lower operative mortality and similar 5-year survival. It seems that local resection of minute HCC with 1-2cm surrounding liver parenchyma can be agreeable as radical resection, since the tumor has not yet broken through the capsule as well as invaded to intrahepatic veins; (4) Reoperation for subclinical recurrence and solitary lung metastasis after a radical resection seems acceptable with further prolongation of survival and no longer a contraindication; (5) The much higher percentage of single nodule HCC, the more frequent normalization of AFP after resection of tumor and the more favorable survival in sub-HCC attested that unicentric origin was not scarcely encountered in early stage patients of HCC even coexisting with cirrhosis. Moreover, evidence of single nodule HCC, well encapsulated tumor, without tumor emboli, immunostatus and survival indicated that intrahepatic spreading rather multicentric origin may play a more important role in the multinodular pattern of huge HCC, thus strongly supported to the policy of aggressive surgical intervention to sub-HCC.”

二、分析及改寫

對這段文字的英語表達予以分析如下。

第一句指出現(xiàn)在許多關(guān)于治療肝癌的觀念 在治療亞臨床肝癌中應加以改變。文中“namely”后面的5條，語法上應該是“Many concepts and principles”的同位語，可是看其內(nèi)容卻是作者提出的新觀點，因此這一句應改為：“Many concepts and principles currently accepted in the management of HCC should be replaced by new ones in sub-HCC treatment.”在“sub-HCC”后加上“treatment”，使意義較清楚。

其次，在(1)中，該句的主語“analysis”是單數(shù)，可是謂語動詞卻錯用復數(shù)；又“added with”應改為“together with”。

在(2)中，“which”不知何所指？可能是指“surgery”，但也講不通。“it”又是指什么？作者的意思應該是指可切除率(resectability)，但此詞在文中尚未出現(xiàn)過。所以此句應改為：“As 48% of sub-HCC could be successfully resected while the resectability of clin-HCC was only 17.7%, the role of surgery has become greater in the treatment of sub-HCC.”

在(3)中，“fact”后面是同位語從句，應該有完整的主語和謂語。因此，“associated”應改為“were associated”，后面的“74.3% with tumor seating in”應改為“74.3% had the tumor seated in”。“seating”之所以改為“seated”是因為“seat”作為不及物動詞只指機器安裝，而“be seated”才解釋“位于”。“in right lobe or hepatic porta”應改為“in the right lobe or around the hepatic porta”，因為腫瘤不是在肝門“里面”，而是在肝門“周圍”的。因此，這句應改為“based on the fact that 83.6% of sub-HCC were associated with cirrhosis and 74.3% had the tumor seated in the right lobe or around the hepatic porta…”。下句中“agreeable”宜改為“accepted”或“considered”；“as well as”應改為“or”；“invaded to”應改為“invaded”，因為“invade”是及物動詞。

在(4)中，“further prolongation of survival”是“reoperation”的結(jié)果，又是“acceptable”的理由。因此，這句應改為“As reoperation for subclinical liver recurrence and solitary lung metastasis after a radiacal resection may lead to further prolongation of survival, it is no longer a contraindication and has become acceptable.”

在(5)中，“even coexisting with”應改為“even with coexisting cirrhosis”；“without tumor emboli”應改為“absence of tumor emboli”；“supported to”應改為“supporting”，因為“support”是及物動詞，況且這里應該用現(xiàn)在分詞。

因此，這一段可以改寫為：

“Many concepts and principles currently accepted in the treatment of HCC should be replaced by new ones. (1) Combined analysis of serial changes of AFP and ALT alone or together with angiogram or B sonogram instead of enzymology and scintiscan has become more important for early diagnosis. (2) As 48% of sub-HCC could be successfully resected while the resectability of clin-HCC was only 17.7%, the role of surgery has become greater in the treatment of sub-HCC. (3) Based on the fact that 83.6% of sub-HCC were associated with cirrhosis and 74.3% had the tumor seated in the right lobe or around the hepatic porta, local resection rather than classical lobectomy in surgical management of sub-HCC has yielded higher resectability, lower operative mortality and similar 5-year survival rate. It seems that local resection of minute HCC along with 1-2cm surrounding liver parenchyma can be accepted as radical resection, since the tumor has not yet broken through the capsule or invaded intrahepatic veins. (4) As reoperation for subclinical liver recurrence and solitary lung metastasis after a radical resection may lead to further prolongation of survival, it should be an acceptable practice and no longer a contraindication. (5) The much higher percentage of single nodule HCC, the more frequent normalization of AFP after resection of tumor and the more favorable survival rate in sub-HCC attested tha unicentric origin was not scarcely encountered in early stage patients of HCC even with coexisting cirrhosis. Moreover, evidence of single nodule HCC, well encapsulated tumor, absence of tumor emboli, immunostatus and survival rate indicated that intraheptic spreading rather than multicentric origin may play a more important role in the multinodular pattern of huge HCC, thus strongly supporting the policy of aggressive surgical intervention in sub-HCC.”

筆者在從醫(yī)時曾有機會閱讀過許多醫(yī)學專家寫的英語醫(yī)學論文，文章的學術(shù)水平都是很高的，但英語的水平實在不敢恭維。我們不期望醫(yī)學專家全成為英語專家，只是希望他們的英語論文少出一點錯誤，多下點功夫把英語學好。

三、論文寫作ABC

英語醫(yī)學論文寫作ABC，即Accuracy(準確)、Brevity(簡短)、Clarity(清晰)。

缺乏Accuracy 的醫(yī)學文章會害死人。

缺乏Brevity 的文章啰啰唆唆，廢話連篇，讀起來累死人。

缺乏Clarity 的雜亂無章，顛三倒四，念起來累死人。

1.Accuracy

醫(yī)學論文不同于文學作品，不要求詞藻華麗，描寫細膩。但它要求詞能達意，并且表達得十分準確，使讀者不致琢磨不準甚至產(chǎn)生誤解。講話應直截了當，開門見山。例如，下面這句子就不是很好：

“As far as the study goes, the results tend to show an approximate relationship between growth rate and dietary intake.”

最好改為：

“The results show a weak relationship between growth rate and dietary intake.”

在醫(yī)學文章中，一些帶有主觀性的詞語除了在Discussion中偶可出現(xiàn)外，一般不宜應用，例如perhaps，maybe，likely，suggests，it seems，possibly，probably等。

描寫程度的詞不要隨便使用，如：Substantial，adequate，considerable，actually，really，quite，rather，fairly，extremely，mostly，relatively，comparatively等，能用數(shù)字表達的則盡量用數(shù)字。

不要用比喻，包括明喻(simile)和暗喻(metaphor)，因為比喻不可能百分之百確當，反而會歪曲原意。

英語中同義詞(Synonyms)特多，例如big的同義詞便有l(wèi)arge，great，grand，huge，immense，enormous，gigantic，collosal等好多個。在文學中往往大量使用同義詞使文章不致枯燥，但在醫(yī)學文章中切莫這樣做，因為醫(yī)學上許多詞往往有特定的含義，不能任意更換的。例如symptom和sign在非醫(yī)學文章中可以互相換用，但在醫(yī)學文章中則絕對不行。又如significant在非科技文章中可解釋為“有意義的”、“重要的”、“有效的”、“值得注意的”，而在科技文章中只是指“統(tǒng)計學上顯著的”。又如approximately在科技上是指數(shù)值十分近似的，若只是一個很粗略的估計就不能用它，而只能用about或roughly。

下面列舉的這些成對的詞常易被互相錯用。心中無把握的作者在使用前最好查一下詞典，并閱讀其中例句：

Alternatively, alternately; centre, middle; degree, extent; either, both; except, unless; generally, usually; homogenous, homogeneous; lengthy, long; limited, slight; major, great; minor, little; natural, normal; optimistic, hopeful; optimum, highest; provided that, if; quite, rather; several, some; similar, same; rare, singular; often, in many places; sometimes, in some places; superior, better than; view, opinion; virtually, almost; volume, amount; weather, climate; while, although.

2.Brevity

任何文章都要求寫得簡短些，科技文章尤其如此，特別要求避免嚕唆冗長(verbosity)、空話(emptiness)、套話(cliche)、長話(wordiness)、大話(pomposity)。下面這個句子是從國內(nèi)一本科技英語教材中找到的：

The onset of chronic leukemia is frequently so insidious that it is accidently discovered when a blood count is obtained for other reasons or when the patient reports to his physician that he has noted a few enlarged lymph nodes or felt, while bathing, a firm left upper quadrant abdominal mass.

它完全可以簡化成：

The onset of chronic leukemia is often insidious. It may be accidently found when a blood count is obtained for other reasons. Sometimes the patient’s own discovery of enlarged lymph nodes or a firm left upper quadrant abdominal mass may lead to its diagnosis.

The English language is about one-half redundant.(英語中約有一半是贅言)

其實這句話本身有一半是贅言，它可以改成：

English is half redundant.

這方面的例子多不勝數(shù)，隨便舉一些例子如下：

During the month of May可簡化成in May；on an experimental basis可簡化成by experiment；for a further period of ten years可簡化成for another 10 years；It consists essentially of two parts可簡化成It has 2 parts等等。

3.Clarity

文章表述清晣，首先在于作者思維的邏輯性和文章的條理性，不論用漢語或英語寫文章都有這個要求。

1973年美國出版了一本專門為非英語國家的醫(yī)生學習醫(yī)學英語而編寫的教材，其中有這樣一段話：

Prior to admission, the patient had a history of aching right upper quadrant abdominal pain of three months’ duration, which was rather sporadic in occurrence.

這句話完全可以簡寫成：

Before admission, the patient had occasional right upper abdominal pain for 3 months.

科技文章要能清晰地傳達信息往往需要用圖表來說明，因此應盡量使用圖表。醫(yī)學文章有一個很壞的傳統(tǒng)，就是晦澀難懂，讓外行人看不懂。醫(yī)生的處方傳統(tǒng)是用拉丁文，就是讓患者看不懂。我們必須改一下這個文風。

編者按：錢紹昌教授畢業(yè)于上海圣約翰大學醫(yī)學院。畢業(yè)后入廣慈醫(yī)院(現(xiàn)瑞金醫(yī)院)外科，后任燒傷科主任。1958年，廣慈醫(yī)院搶救鋼鐵工人邱財康成功，引起全國轟動。著名作家柯靈將此事寫成劇本，1959年由天馬電影制片廠拍成電影。錢教授當時為三名參加搶救的醫(yī)生之一。由于他的醫(yī)術(shù)高超，為我國灼傷醫(yī)學領域作出貢獻，1965年，錢紹昌曾赴京參加全國青聯(lián)代表大會，受到毛主席、劉主席、周總理和鄧總書記等中央領導的接見并合影留念。

錢教授不但是一名醫(yī)學專家，也是一名杰出的翻譯家。2004年中國譯協(xié)授予他“資深翻譯家”榮譽證書。在20年中，他共翻譯了700多部(集)影視片，有著名影片《鷹冠莊園》、《大飯店》、《成長的煩惱》、《根》、《荊棘鳥》、《卡薩布蘭卡》、《浮華世家》……其中3部獲全國電視譯制片一等獎。在20世紀90年代，錢教授還翻譯了很多(中譯英)科技片，其中《冠心病》獲意大利國際電影節(jié)的金獎，《逆火》獲德國第16屆柏林電視節(jié)大獎——“亞洲未來獎”。1993年，上海的遠東出版社出版了他的《英語科技論文寫作概要》一書。

錢教授從1980年初，開始執(zhí)教于上海外國語大學的國際新聞系。

A Tentative Discussion on Medical English—Medical Experts are not English Experts

Qian Shaochang

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In view of the fact that many Chinese doctors, including a lot of experts, are making numerous language mistakes in their English language medical articles, the author analyses with concrete examples those mistakes commonly made in English medical articles and discusses the ABC of Science writing. Meanwhile, the author hopes Chinese doctors will improve their English language skills.

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H0-05

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1009-895X(2012)03-0169-04

2012-08-08

錢紹昌(1930-)，男，教授。研究方向：翻譯理論與實踐。E-mail: scqian1234@yahoo.cn