江蘇省贛榆縣羅陽中學(xué)七(5)班 吳甜甜
?
My School
江蘇省贛榆縣羅陽中學(xué)七(5)班 吳甜甜
My school is very beautiful.There are lots of beautiful flowers and trees in my school but①it is always clean and tidy.
There is a big playground in my school.We have P.E.classes on the playground and we often do sports there.Our teaching building has five floors.My classroom is on the fifth floor.It is big and clean.The computer rooms are on the third floor.There is a big library on the second floor.There are many books in the library.I often read books there.There are some music rooms and art rooms in the teaching building,too.The teachers in our school are very kind.The students are very polite and clever.
I love my school,because it’s my the②second home.
【欄目要求】
1.將學(xué)生習(xí)作根據(jù)中考分值給出成績(jī);2.在應(yīng)該修改的地方劃線并標(biāo)注序號(hào);
3.根據(jù)所標(biāo)序號(hào)進(jìn)行修改并說明修改的理由;4.給學(xué)生習(xí)作點(diǎn)評(píng)〈優(yōu)點(diǎn)與不足〉;
5.請(qǐng)點(diǎn)評(píng)名師提供簡(jiǎn)歷一份,包括:學(xué)校、職務(wù)、職稱、榮譽(yù)、教研教學(xué)成果、照片一張。
投稿郵箱:zxsyy2007@163.com或whzxsyy@163.com
來稿請(qǐng)寄:430079華中師范大學(xué)外國(guó)語學(xué)院《中學(xué)生英語》雜志社收
本期點(diǎn)評(píng)名師
陳傳光男,中學(xué)一級(jí)教師,江蘇省贛榆縣羅陽中學(xué),從事教育教學(xué)工作數(shù)年。江蘇省教育學(xué)會(huì)會(huì)員,連云港市優(yōu)秀教育園丁,贛榆縣優(yōu)秀班主任。有多篇論文在各雜志期刊上發(fā)表并獲獎(jiǎng)。曾獲全國(guó)中學(xué)生新課程英語語言能力競(jìng)賽優(yōu)秀輔導(dǎo)教師一等獎(jiǎng)。
點(diǎn)評(píng)
1.優(yōu)點(diǎn):
小作者首先向我們介紹了她所在學(xué)校的整體環(huán)境,然后又介紹了操場(chǎng)及教學(xué)樓的分布情況,最后點(diǎn)明學(xué)校是自己另一個(gè)家。文章用詞得當(dāng),條理清晰,是一篇優(yōu)秀的學(xué)生習(xí)作。
2.需要修改的地方:
①but改為and。由上下文可知,前后是并列關(guān)系;
②the去掉。序數(shù)詞前有形容詞性物主代詞修飾時(shí),不要加定冠詞the。
3.評(píng)分:
按江蘇省連云港市中考英語作文滿分20分的評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn),本文修改前可得18分。