幽默兩則

Language Skills

A teacher asked her students to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.

Marta said, “My family went to the Louisville Zoo, and it was fascinating to see all the animals.”

The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted the word ‘fascinate.”

Sarita raised her hand. She said, “My family went to the Cincinnati Zoo and I was fascinated by the animals.”

“Thats good, too,” said the teacher, “but I wanted the word ‘fascinate.”

Little Billy raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because Billy was noted for his bad language, but surely he couldnt damage the word “fascinate”, so she called on him. Billy said proudly, “My sister has a sweater with 10 buttons, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten eight.”

語言能力

老師讓學(xué)生用“記不住”一詞造句。

馬爾塔站起來說：“我們?nèi)疑闲瞧谌チ寺芬淄柺袆游飯@，動物多的簡直讓人記不住?！?/p>

“很好，”老師說，“但是，句子還不夠生動?！?/p>

另一個學(xué)生薩瑞塔舉手起來發(fā)言：“我們?nèi)チ诵列聊翘釀游飯@，我實在是記不住那么多的動物?！?/p>

“好，”老師說，“只是和馬爾塔的句子差不多?！?/p>

這時，小彼利舉起了手。由于小彼利學(xué)習(xí)較差，也造不出什么好的句子來，老師猶豫了一下，還是叫了小彼利。小彼利站起來自豪地說：“我姐姐的羊毛衫上有十個扣子，由于她太胖，只系住了八個，還剩下兩個系不住?！?/p>

Behind Schedule

At a small station in Zambia(贊比亞) a traveler asks: “Since the trains are all-too-often behind schedule, what's the function of the timetable?” The station-master says:“Absolutely wrong! Were there no timetable, how could you know they are behind schedule?” The traveler finds it both funny and annoying, asking:“Could it be said that it is impossible to take some measures?” The station-master says:“We just now added a row of benches in the waiting room, what?”

誤點

在贊比亞的一個小車站，旅客問：“既然火車整天誤點，還要時間表干什么？”站長說：“怎么說話的，如果沒有時間表，你怎么知道誤點？”旅客哭笑不得，再問：“難道就不能采取什么治理措施嗎？”站長說：“這不剛剛在候車室加了一排長椅子嗎？”